You Are Not Invisible - Reclaiming Power from Deception and Doubt

Recently, I was approached by someone on Facebook. His profile checked all the boxes—successful, powerful, financially secure, and good-looking—the kind of person who, on the surface, might seem like an unexpected but exciting connection. While I had seen similar requests before and declined them, this time, I made a different choice.

This time, I chose to engage—not out of belief but out of curiosity. I wanted to see what would unfold, observe the patterns, and understand what was really at play.

If your reflection could speak, what would it say?

How They Prey on the Wounds We Carry

Scammers don’t just target people randomly. They are highly strategic. They tailor their approach to those they believe are most likely to engage—often older, single, or divorced women who may have experienced feelings of loneliness, invisibility, or self-doubt.

They rely on us questioning:

• Would someone like that actually notice me?

• Am I still desirable?

• Maybe this is a chance I shouldn’t pass up.

Because for many women in this stage of life, there’s an unspoken pain—one I once heard spoken aloud in a moment I will never forget.

“People my age are invisible.”

While volunteering with hospice, I met a woman who had been a nurse for many years. She was older than me but still vibrant, intelligent, and compassionate. And yet, she had withdrawn from the world, rarely leaving her home outside of her volunteer work.

One day, she said to me, “No one in my neighborhood bothers me because people my age are invisible."

I felt the weight of those words.

The pain of feeling unseen, of being overlooked, of no longer being considered relevant—it’s a quiet wound carried by many women. Especially older women. And it’s this very wound that scammers, manipulators, and deceivers seek to exploit.

Why I Chose Not to Walk Away in Fear

When I saw where my conversation with the scammer was going, I could have blocked and ignored him. But instead, I did something different—I leaned in with awareness. I didn’t meet him with anger or fear, but with clarity. I asked questions, not just of him, but of myself.

• What does this interaction bring up for me?

• Where am I giving away my power?

• What illusion is he trying to sell me, and why does he think I’d buy it?

And then I remembered the lesson of the Buddha.

The Power of Not Accepting the Gift

There’s a well-known story where a merchant, filled with anger and hatred, tried to insult the Buddha. He hurled words of vitriol, but the Buddha remained unmoved.

Finally, the merchant demanded, “Why do you not react? Why do you not defend yourself?”

The Buddha replied, “If someone offers you a gift and you do not accept it, to whom does the gift belong?”

This is the key.

The scammer was offering me a gift—a false story, a manipulative game, an illusion meant to provoke emotions that would make me easy to control.

But I did not accept it.

Like the Buddha, I left his gift with him. And in that moment, the power was no longer his. It was mine.

You Are Not Invisible—And You Are Not Powerless

Scammers try to exploit feelings of invisibility, but it’s not just scammers who capitalize on this feeling. Society, too, often overlooks women as they age, subtly reinforcing the idea that their value has diminished. But that is the greatest illusion of all. Here is the real truth:

You are not invisible.

You are not powerless.

And you are not unworthy of love, attention, or desire from someone real.

If you’ve ever been tempted to believe that you are too old, too alone, or too something to be seen and valued, remember this: those thoughts are the real scam. They are the deception negative forces want you to believe.

The world may not always reflect our worth back to us, but that does not mean it isn’t there. And when we stop seeking validation from external sources—whether scammers, social media, or societal expectations—we take back our power in ways that no one can ever steal.

So to every woman who has ever felt unseen: I see you.

The only question now: Will you see yourself as I see you?